My sister and her husband are renewing their vows this weekend. When they got married 10 years ago, they were strapped for cash so they just opted to go the the courthouse to get their marriage license. Then they waited like 10 days before telling my parents. That last bit was widely regarded as a pretty bad move, but that's a whole other story that I'll tell at some other point. It comes complete with death threats, fisticuffs, crying maidens and explosions. Well...okay, no explosions.
So for this upcoming ceremony, my sis really wanted to go all out and have the wedding she always wanted. As she described what she wanted to me, I realized that I'm not the only person in the family who has a taste for things of "epic proportions". While listening to her plans, I started imagining a wedding where each member in the wedding party rode in on giant winged-tigers that belched fire, while Iron Maiden played the processional march. My fantasy came to a screeching halt when she told me to go and get fitted for a tux.
Now, I like looking good and I do actually like wearing tuxedos. What I don't like though, are tuxedos that someone else picks out for you. That's how people end up in those powder-blue numbers that were popular in 1950. I was hesitant but then I thought "Hey, it's her day" and did what any good brother would do; procrastinate until I absolutely had to go.
To make a long story short, I went and got fitted and other than the attendant's sour milk breath, I had no issues. I paid up and was told to pick it up today. I got there after work and they led me to the changing rooms and I finally saw it...
Apparently, my sister's dream wedding has me in a bright red bow-tie. This is what I get for being such a f**king brat when I was little.
Sorry about the late post! I lost track of time while trying to fix an amplifier yesterday. I'll say 1000 Hail Mary's in penance for it ;)
Have a great weekend everyone!
-Dan
8 comments:
Enjoy the wedding Dan!
At first I thought Katherine was writing this and I was trying to visualize her in a tux... but then... well, gosh, she probably looks good in anything.... even red bow ties.
I love wearing tuxs. Makes me feel fancy and shit.
Thanks Intense Guy, I will! I totally agree that she looks good in anything. Maybe I can get her to try it on, though she'll be swimming in it, haha.
You can always get your revenge for the red bow tie by having a clown nose in your pocket to slip on at just the right moment during the ceremony!
Lori - That's a wicked idea!
DO IT.
Your dream wedding made me really LOL this morning.
People in this cube farm already think I'm a freak so it's all good.
Based on my own past with my own bratty brothers, I'm gonna go ahead and say I'm sure you earned this one. ;)
She totally did this on purpose.
And you must post pics of you in that red bow tie very soon.
I promise I am not the only person who wants to see those pics.
And post one of your lady in the black dress she bought for the occasion...again, I am sure there are others who want to see them!
Payback is sweet...
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